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Hi all, little bit of context. Im (30M) am in a relationship with a 35F. We have been together for 3 months, and dhe to various reasons, it has been a little rocky at times. Basically we both came out of abusive relationships last year and dragged a lot of emotions with us into the new relationship. But we are working through those together.

Issue I am having is that my anxiety is damaging the relationship. Ive had anxiety all my life, I have been receiving counselling, albeit limited; and I am on medication for it. But often when I make mistakes in the relationship, i often cannot let go of the guilt and the memory of them. Often I ruminate about them for days or even weeks, which leads me to seek reassurance repeatedly from her about them.

For clarification, the mistakes I make tend to be around saying the wrong sort of thing without thinking, doing something impulsive or just general stupidity. Nothing serious or hurtful. Just my bloody Autism!

Thing is, how do I stop ruminating on these mistakes? I know she doesnt like me doing it. Because it just adds pressure onto the relationship and her and thats the one thing she doesnt want in her life. Take this for example, last night I made a stupid comment without thinking, and Ive spent all day so far thinking about it and worrying about what to do. Or what gesture or action to do to apologise. When I have already apologised last night. Guarantee she wants me to never bring it up again and just move on and keep it lighthearted. My head right now is not allowing that to happen.

Any advice anyone?